My Pain

This is a long one but a good one.  This came out of searching God regarding several things.  I pray it blesses you as much as it blessed me!

My Pain

We have all experienced time of pain.  Whether it be depression, post-partum depression, anxiety, loss, or perceived loss, the pain is all very real.  Recently, I was pondering the tools God gives us to help us through our tough times (and our good times).  Here is the thing about tools – you have to learn to use them.  I LOVE tools.  In my mind, I am a renovation master, a master of the skill saw, a wiz with the drill. 

The truth is, I love tools but my skills are pretty limited.  Why?  Why haven’t I taken the time to learn to use a skill saw, a jig saw, a drill or the others?  Why do I need to?  I have a husband that can build anything (and when I say anything, I really  mean it.  He built our house).  It is an easy escape to just call Scott to take care of things for me.  “Hey, Husband, can you build this table for me?”  “Hey, Scott, let’s add a bathroom upstairs for KK.”  “Oh!  Honey, do you think you could make this shelf for me?”  Really, the list is limitless … and so is his current Honey Do List!  But what do I do when he isn’t home and I need something done immediately?  You know, that bookshelf that I purchased on a whim that needs to be assembled or the shelving unit I bought that he told me wouldn’t work but I needed to prove him wrong (and by the way, he was right).  Or that dog house I bought that I was too proud to ask him for help?  I pull out my own tool kit.; the one that consists of a butter knife and a high heel shoe.  Yes, I am serious; I think most things can be assembled with a butter knife and a high heel shoe. 

I had a tool kit once.  Scott told me he would help me learn to use the tools included but it was easier to just ask him to take care of it for me.  Do you know what happened to that tool kit?  I sold it in a yard sale.  Many times, we do the same thing with God.  He gives us tools to use but we don’t like that.  We want the immediate fix.  We want something done the way we want it done and we want it done right now!  Can anyone relate?  I want to share a couple of things that I thought through the other night. 

It was late in the evening and I was super exhausted.  I had worked a 10plus hour day at the church THEN did my mom taxi job, a couple of loads of laundry, took care of dinner and then promised someone I would get them some thoughts on a particular situation.  In my moment of exhaustion, God began to sweetly unfold some great truth to me.   God has given us tools to make it through some tough times, we just need to use them!  Here ya go …

1.     Relationships:

a.     Abraham and Isaac were in community as they were walking to the mountain.  Both men were fully aware of the current situation but both focused on the end result (God will provide) rather than the immediate need (we have no sacrifice).

b.     Jochebed (Moses mom) was about to send her son down the river … in a basket of sorts.  That is huge!  What about crocodiles, what about waves …. What if, what if, what if ….  However, she had Miriam.  The one that was able to go and get Jochebed and bring her to the palace. 

c.      Relationships are the currency of the kingdom.  Everywhere we look in the Bible, we see relationships.  It is so important we even have scriptures about the importance of relationships. 

d.     So if this is one of the tools God has given us to help us through our good and bad days, it is something that needs to be examined.  Who are your relationships with?  I’m not talking about girls day out or shopping trips.  I’m talking about who is walking out this faith walk with you?  Who is bringing you back in when you are having a rough go of it, who is rejoicing with you when you are having a great go of it?  Who is able to speak the hard things to you – even when it is difficult to say/receive and you know it is in love and not get hurt or offended?

e.     There is a difference in a best friend relationship and a spiritual mother/mentor relationship.  Do you have this relationship in your life?

f.      It is so important to make time to have this in your life.  When a spiritual walk is out of balance, chaos will ensue. 

2.     The Word:  There is no substitute for getting in God’s word.  There was one season of my life where I worked a full time job and two part time jobs as well  I also had a small child at home and a husband that I helped with his ministry position all the while trying to maintain our marriage.  Where was I going to find time to read the Word?  It seemed impossible.  A very dear lady told me to use my lunch hour.  I packed a lunch and would spend my lunch break reading the Bible.  It began to bring so much peace to my soul.  The scriptures about the bread of life became so real to me during those times.  Those were very hectic and chaotic days of our life.  Scott and I were like ships passing in the night but we were both in the Word and it was an anchor for us.  We will always stay too busy to get in the Word.  We have to arrange the busy to make the time. It isn’t about a religious obligation to read a chapter in the Bible a day or complete a Bible study workbook.  It is so much more than that.  It is having communication with God.  Sometimes that means meditating on the same scripture for a while or reading the same section of scriptures over and over.  It is about relationship. 

3.     Prayer:  This is the communication time

a.     So many times we go to prayer and just lay it all out there for God and walk away.  Prayer is so much more than that.

b.     Recently, Scott preached a message on how we make prayer hard.  We shortchange the opportunity to say prayers instead of living the lifestyle of prayer.  We should be aware of His presence and that is our directive in prayer.  I can be in prayer without ever saying prayers out of my mouth.  We let our minds run wild because we can’t rope our minds into submission of the Word.  Our thoughts become our mediation and we become unaware of His presence, which is always with us.

c.      Prayer is a constant, ongoing mode rather than an action.  Yes, there are the times when God will call you away to just pray for a period of time but we should be in a mode of prayer all day long, every day. 

d.     Where are you in your prayer life?  Are you laying it all out there and just walking away or are you daily inviting God’s presence to surround you?  Are you surrendering your day to Him or are you asking Him to surrender His day to you?

4.     Worship:

a.     This is our time to just give God honor.  This can be hard, especially when you are in the midst of pain. 

b.     Think about this – in the pain you are enduring, are you only looking at the pain or are you looking at the long-term picture.

c.      When we are in a situation that is trying (Maybe you have lost a child, or have a loved one with caner.  Maybe a dream has been shattered or a hope is lost) we always focus on that immediate situation. 

d.     If we think about the end result, it is easier to give honor to God. 

e.     Many years ago, I had a dream of a huge family.  I could only have one child and my dream of a large family was lost.  As I look back on that pain, it was so real.  However, when I look at my life now, I am so fulfilled parenting my daughter. 

f.      Don’t withdraw from God because of pain.  Draw near to Him and ask him to help you see the big picture.

I challenge you – use the tools that have been set before you.  God desires relationship with us and we need to use the tools He has provided.

We All Need An Editor

We All Need an Editor

This is a shout out, a thank you, a stand up and take a bow kind of post.  You all know those people!  They are the ones that do so much and rarely (if ever) ask for anything in return.  They are just …. amazing!  They are our editors! What is an editor?  It is someone that reviews your work, tells you what they like, what they don’t like and what you should change and rearrange.  Think about it for a minute.  Who is your life editor?   Do you think you need an editor?

I know God, our creator, as my Editor in Chief.  He is the top dog that has final say in my decisions, my actions and my life.  Seriously, that is a non-negotiable in my life.  I know the one that created me, formed me, and gave me all my crazy antics that my wonderful husband has to deal with all the time.  Ephesians 2:10 says - For we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  This is a reminder that I do have a purpose and I am designed to use the gifts and skills God has given me.

So, with that in mind, let’s consider the editor.  Who is the person that helps mine out the hidden gems in your life?  Who is the person that you bounce ideas off of and get creative with?  Who is the person that inspires you to become a better version of you, working on the skills and passions God has given you?  So many times we are so consumed with all our flaws and faults that we walk away from the editor(s) God has given us.  When someone starts to mine out those gems, the discomfort of the process puts us on the run and we just want to get out of town, so to speak. 

I want to thank all the editors in my life.  Those that remind me to do better, do be better and to pursue better every day.  We are the handiwork of God, created to do good works.  Thank you to those that remind me to pursue God with passion and do life with excellence. 

What works are you doing that produces good?  Maybe it is buying coffee for a friend, maybe it is being the one that reads a blog and says “hey this is good” or “hey this needs some work” (THANK YOU JADA!!).  Whatever that good is that you are doing, do it with passion and excellence because you have skills.  MAD SKILLS!

But I Don’t Wanna ….

How many of us have said those words?  Think about it for a minute.  Maybe you haven’t said them out loud.  Maybe they just roll around in your head as tasks arise, as people seek your time or as God directs you about something.  It is like our bargaining tool.  Maybe if I act like a toddler (even if just in my head) I will have temper tantrum success and we just won’t have ta’. 

The truth is, you don’t have ta’.  You can ignore the tasks, the people and even God’s direction.  You have the power of choice within you.  However, if you skip out on the things that you don’t want to do, what will you miss out on because you did? 

Think about Jeremiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord …. We all know that scripture.  It is the scripture we quote when we have a bad day, when we don’t understand what is going on, when we just don’t wanna’.  We also quote it to try to manipulate our circumstances.  When things are tough (maybe because we missed the mark and did something …. A little …. Stupid,  or when we think we know the will of God but not his timing.  You know – those things :))  Let’s examine that a little more.  This scripture was written to a group that had been taken captive, removed from their home, and taken far away.  Do you think they wanna’ed??  I’m guessing not!  King Neb rounded up 10,000 (yep, that’s a lot of people) citizens when he invaded Judah.  He sent them 500 miles from their home.  Who among us can say we have felt like one of those captives?  Everything was fine then ** BAM ** (said in my best crazy voice with inflection so as to grab the attention of the reader) something happens that shakes us to the core of our being and we become captive to a circumstance. 

It wasn’t until they were already captive and in exile that the prophet Jeremiah sent them a word from the Lord.  They were receiving instruction on what to do in season they just didn’t want to be in.  How many of us have been in a season we just don’t want to be in?  Maybe you feel like one of the exiles.  I wish we could embrace Jeremiah 29:11 for the truth of what it says – God does offer us a hope and a future but sometimes we have to endure the rough seasons.  This scripture is a promise that God would later fulfill but not immediately.  They had to set up shop so to speak and endure the season and make the best of it.  They had to build in the place of brokenness.

Jeremiah told them to take a wife, build homes, plant gardens – these are all adjustments and major life decisions he was instructing them to do.  See, sometimes we enter a season where we feel like we are captive to a bad circumstance or a series of bad deals.  However, God still knows exactly where we are and what we are doing.  Make the best of the bad times.  Adjust, adapt and remember that our personal fulfillment isn’t guaranteed.  They were exiled for 70 years – imagine the people that never made it back home.  That is why, I believe, they were told to set up residence.  They were instructed to make a life instead of their own instead of the circumstances making life for them.  If we allow our circumstances to dictate to us how we feel, we will live defeated and deflated today and possibly excited and ecstatic tomorrow and constantly on a roller coaster of emotions.  We need to adjust and adapt to the ebbs and flows of life.  We need to rely on our deep roots of faith to carry us in the times of exile and captivity so that when we are in those days, we can still build a life and enjoy the good days. 

I’m not saying that life is just a doom and gloom kind of thing.  Those of you that know me know I am a carrier of joy.  I love to make people laugh and smile.  That deep joy comes from walking out some great times and some difficult times.  There is joy in the journey and God truly does work things out for our good.  It just isn’t always like we think it should be.  And that’s OK.  Some days I just don’t wanna but I do because I know that the bad days are only seasons and that I can choose to make the best and see the glory in all things. 

So, instead of having I Just Don’t Wanna kind of days, let’s agree to plant gardens, build houses and make the best of each day given.  Let’s recognize that even in our days of exile, God still wants us to have family, relationships and provision.  So, don’t keep your eyes on the circumstantial captivity but the One that holds our heart captive, Jesus.

Car Horns and Garbage Trucks

As I sit here on a Monday morning, I am gazing out of the large square window of my sister’s home.  The view is stunning and it overlooks the marsh.  It is a serene sight to behold. The sky is blue, the breeze is gently blowing and the marsh grass is dancing around as if it is a small child dancing and twirling for daddy's attention.  It is such a peaceful moment that would bring the busiest of minds to a place of calm reflection.  Then it happens, that moment of interruption that quickly and sharply pulls us from our moment of peace and tranquility. The garbage truck comes bustling down the road and a car horn blows, as if both are setting of an alarm of reality that blares "Life is messy and life is loud!"  Here's the thing - I can't see the garbage truck or the car.  I can only hear the rumbling of the truck and the irritable, loud squeaking of the horn that seems to beg "excuse me" rather than "get the heck out of my way".  Regardless of my ability to see those things, the sounds disrupt my amazing moment of marsh gazing to a snap back that life is happening outside the confines of the walls of my sister’s home.  

What do you do when life gets messy and loud?  What do you do when it doesn't go according to your plan?  It is important to have a place (both mentally and physically) that you can stop to reflect and experience the peace that only God can provide.  It is a peace that passes all understanding.  It is a place where you can dream, imagine, cry, rest!  In that place, your soul can be renewed, your mind can find rest and joy can be refilled .... And in some cases restored.  

My challenge to you is find that place of refuge, of strength.  That place you can go that you can sit with Lord and draw in His strength.  There are some days the garbage trucks won't pass and the car horns won't blow.  But the days they do, you will be armed with strength and ready to take on the trash and inconvenience that presents itself to you.  We often quote Deut. 31:6 in times of trouble – Be strong and courageous …. When you quote that verse do you consider where strength comes from?  Strength is something that is built over time.  Be sure you are working on your strength when the car horns and garbage trucks are not around so when they are, you will be strong and courageous - you've got this!

Deuteronomy 31:6(AMP)

6 Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble in dread before them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not fail you or abandon you.”