There will always be someone
At the end of 2015, I was thinking
through some of the events of the year. As
I walked away from my desk, I announced to my husband “I’m done with
people!” He looked at me, kind of
bewildered, and said something along the lines of “Well, considering what we
do, I’m guessing you aren’t done with people.”
No, I’m not really done with people… but I (italicized the “I”
for emphasis) am done with people. Here is the deal
– if I am done, God can work. I thought
of all the situations, in 2015, I tried to fix, handle and/or manage. The five
major things I realized are:
1.
There will always
be someone to tell you that you are doing it wrong, all wrong. I am not sure what “it” really is but, whatever
“it” is, you are doing it wrong. LOL
To those people, you could be making a PB&J, and use the wrong bread, so,
the sandwich is no good. Or, maybe you are really trying to help someone;
you’re doing the best you can, but because you’re not helping them they way they want, your help is received at
arm’s length.
2.
There will always
be someone who will try to control you.
This can range from well meaning relationships to those who want to
dominate. Regardless of the circumstance
and relationship, we all have to come to the understanding that we are
responsible for ourselves. Healthy
relationships have a few key factors –
a.
We have someone
who speaks into our lives, mentors us, tells us when we are wrong, and someone
with whom we are in a position to be humble and teachable. Someone that sees the gifts and calling
within us, and pulls that out and strengthens it. That person that doesn’t allow us to be
comfortable, but is always pushing us to become better.
b.
Then, we have a
friend. That someone who laughs with us,
cries with us and isn’t afraid to tell us what we need to hear, not just want
we want to hear. That friend who isn’t
afraid to set us straight when we try to gossip. Yet, when we are broken, isn’t
afraid to comfort. That iron sharpening iron
relationship. The process of sharpening
isn’t easy but the result is good. A
friend that leads to destruction is no friend at all.
c.
Then, we need
someone that we can mentor. The thing
about mentoring is defining the balance of the relationship. You can only mentor a willing and teachable
person. Sometimes, as leaders, we will
be wrong and it is crucial to be able to admit to those times. But, as a person being mentored, we need to
accept that sometimes we are wrong, even when we are so certain we are
right.
3.
There will always
be a joy sucker. This is the person in
your life who, no matter how much joy you try to share, their glass will always
be empty. I mean, it’s not even half
empty. It’s just empty. Dry. Like,
sitting in the cabinet dry! The truth is
it’s our job is to spread joy, and not allow others to be joy suckers. Our joy doesn’t come from people; it comes
from the Lord, so, why get down when a joy sucker tries to share their gloom,
despair and agony with you. Share the
word, be an encourager but don’t allow that negativity to attach to you and
suck the joy out of your life.
4.
There will always
be the person who is always right. It
doesn’t matter what I say here to quantify this. The reason why – the person
that is always right will read it and tell me why I am wrong and they are right
LOL.
5.
Then, there are
those who are always on the great adventure with you. Those who are on your team, the ones that
bring you joy, the ones who carry your heart and your vision. Those are where you concentrate your energy
and focus. Those relationships are
priceless!
I could add more to this list, but I am
sure you get the general picture. I think 2016 is going to be a great year of
giving up on people. Not in the bad way,
like disregarding everyone, but in a positive way. I am giving up, and allowing God to do what
He does. I am finding those who are on this adventure with me, and stay
connected with them. I am spending time
mentoring, being a friend and allowing myself to be teachable. I am going to be a joy spreader, instead of a
joy sucker. I am giving up my right to
be right, and will be admitting when I am wrong. I am choosing to fall in the category of
enjoying the great adventure, and I am looking forward to a great year!
