There Will Always Be Someone

There will always be someone

At the end of 2015, I was thinking through some of the events of the year.  As I walked away from my desk, I announced to my husband “I’m done with people!”  He looked at me, kind of bewildered, and said something along the lines of “Well, considering what we do, I’m guessing you aren’t done with people.”  No, I’m not really done with people… but I (italicized the “I” for emphasis) am done with people. Here is the deal – if I am done, God can work.  I thought of all the situations, in 2015, I tried to fix, handle and/or manage. The five major things I realized are:

1.   There will always be someone to tell you that you are doing it wrong, all wrong.  I am not sure what “it” really is but, whatever “it” is, you are doing it wrong. LOL To those people, you could be making a PB&J, and use the wrong bread, so, the sandwich is no good. Or, maybe you are really trying to help someone; you’re doing the best you can, but because you’re not helping them they way they want, your help is received at arm’s length.

    

    2.   There will always be someone who will try to control you.  This can range from well meaning relationships to those who want to dominate.  Regardless of the circumstance and relationship, we all have to come to the understanding that we are responsible for ourselves.  Healthy relationships have a few key factors –

a.   We have someone who speaks into our lives, mentors us, tells us when we are wrong, and someone with whom we are in a position to be humble and teachable.  Someone that sees the gifts and calling within us, and pulls that out and strengthens it.  That person that doesn’t allow us to be comfortable, but is always pushing us to become better. 

b.   Then, we have a friend.  That someone who laughs with us, cries with us and isn’t afraid to tell us what we need to hear, not just want we want to hear.  That friend who isn’t afraid to set us straight when we try to gossip. Yet, when we are broken, isn’t afraid to comfort.  That iron sharpening iron relationship.  The process of sharpening isn’t easy but the result is good.  A friend that leads to destruction is no friend at all. 

c.    Then, we need someone that we can mentor.  The thing about mentoring is defining the balance of the relationship.  You can only mentor a willing and teachable person.  Sometimes, as leaders, we will be wrong and it is crucial to be able to admit to those times.  But, as a person being mentored, we need to accept that sometimes we are wrong, even when we are so certain we are right. 

  

      3.   There will always be a joy sucker.  This is the person in your life who, no matter how much joy you try to share, their glass will always be empty.  I mean, it’s not even half empty.  It’s just empty. Dry. Like, sitting in the cabinet dry!  The truth is it’s our job is to spread joy, and not allow others to be joy suckers.  Our joy doesn’t come from people; it comes from the Lord, so, why get down when a joy sucker tries to share their gloom, despair and agony with you.  Share the word, be an encourager but don’t allow that negativity to attach to you and suck the joy out of your life.

   

    4.   There will always be the person who is always right.  It doesn’t matter what I say here to quantify this. The reason why – the person that is always right will read it and tell me why I am wrong and they are right LOL.

   

     5.   Then, there are those who are always on the great adventure with you.  Those who are on your team, the ones that bring you joy, the ones who carry your heart and your vision.  Those are where you concentrate your energy and focus.  Those relationships are priceless!

I could add more to this list, but I am sure you get the general picture. I think 2016 is going to be a great year of giving up on people.  Not in the bad way, like disregarding everyone, but in a positive way.  I am giving up, and allowing God to do what He does. I am finding those who are on this adventure with me, and stay connected with them.  I am spending time mentoring, being a friend and allowing myself to be teachable.  I am going to be a joy spreader, instead of a joy sucker.  I am giving up my right to be right, and will be admitting when I am wrong.  I am choosing to fall in the category of enjoying the great adventure, and I am looking forward to a great year!